Hi Riley, Wow, I have to say: you have a knack for telling stories in such a beautiful way, incorporating dialogues and descriptions that make you visualize and follow the story very smoothly. I love the way you portrayed the character Sunny in such a sympathetic and innocent light. It is a very different perspective than what we were given when reading Surpanakha's story in the Ramayana. I like how you shed the labels of rakshasa/human in this story and the connotations associated with them (ie. humans are good and demons are bad). You show the flaws of the main characters of the Ramayana, how Ramsey, Lux, and Cece look down on Sunny for her unusual appearance, and how Sunny is innocent and merely longs for companionship. Your story really made me think about who is really right or wrong, and that Surpanakha deserves more attention and sympathy than we think when first reading the Ramayana.
Hi Riley! First of all, I wanted to say that I really liked the way you told this story! Your use of description and dialogue really helped set the scene, and I really liked all the dialogue, as so many of the stories that we read don't really have any. I also liked that you decided to write a story about Sunny, as I feel like she was a really interesting character that easily could have so much more depth, but she just didn't get enough time in the story. You added so many different layers to her; I feel like so many minor characters often have much more potential than the main characters, and most of the time, I like reading more about them. I think it's interesting to see how everyone picked their topics, and what stuck out to them the most out of all the material we've covered in this class. I don't really have any suggestions, I loved your story and I am excited to read more!
Hi Riley, I enjoyed reading your stories. I think your portfolio is set up really well and I enjoy your readings. I like the way you wrote your second story. I like the fact you decided to make it a podcast instead of writing an actual story. I think the podcast was a very interesting idea and really made me feel like I should write a story like that. I think the most interesting thing about everyone's portfolio is that they can all decide what stories they write about and how they want to be presented to everyone. I loved your stories and I can't wait to see what your next stories have in store. I really like how much dialogue you have decided to input for both of your stories, it really does make me feel like I'm not writing my stories as good as I can. I don't really have many suggestions for you other than keep up the good work!
Hey Riley, I want to mention how unique I found the author's note in your introduction by putting it at the beginning of the story. I really appreciated that because sometimes it is easier to follow a story when you have the background information, rather than reading the foundation of the story at the end. Your portfolio is easy on the eyes and I am grateful for that. Additionally, I like how you started your introduction with an overview, then jumped right in with a story. It was helpful to know who each character was and how their roles differ throughout your writing journey. This will help me when I read your stories in the future, as I can refer to each character's role throughout. The way you started the second story as a talk show was super creative and shows how many great ideas you have up your sleeve. I look forward to reading more, so keep up the hard work!
Hello Riley! I think the way you cultivate a narrative is really on point. I found your style to be super engaging and immersive. Immersion like with your second story being a podcast is something that came easy to me, being that I watch podcasts all the time. it really helped me imagine the exact type of setting you were going for very well. I also really like how you choose to emphasize dialogue, basically telling most of a story through the dialogue. I like this approach, and it fits very much so for the second story especially.
Hey Riley, First off I want to say that your writing style and the style of your portfolio, in general, is very different. Specifically, the way you write your stories is very different from any that I have read and the style of it is very unique. Your story What Would You Do? was definitely my favorite and I love the way the story was narrated. You did a really good job on that. This week we are meant to focus on the images used throughout your portfolio, and I can say you've done a great job of incorporating images. In your second story, I love that the header is just a classroom. Even though it is subtle it fits the setting of the story and definitely caught my attention. I would say you incorporate an image in your story with a caption that you can explain, other than that your portfolio is great.
Hi Riley! I previously visited your storybook before, and I was excited to see what all you had added to it! This time, I read your project post, "What Would You Do?" and I really enjoyed this one! I haven't seen anything like a podcast before, and I thought this was a really creative idea, as I feel like podcasts are really gaining popularity as of late. I think that the interview style is a really great way to get in touch with some of the characters, as it's easy to incorporate a bunch of different ones while also giving a glimpse into all of their lives. It was very funny and really easy to read, so I loved that a lot! I also like how you incorporated a lot of dialogue, so we get to hear the different tones of all of the characters. Also, it was really helpful that you put the author's note at the top, so we got a little bit of insight as to where you were going. Great job on this piece, it was such a fun read!
Hi Riley, as we end week 12, I took a look at more of your author's notes for each of your storybook stories. Again, I really enjoyed how you included the note at the beginning of the "What Would You Do?" story to give more background information. I also used the shapeshifting technique that Hanuman presents in my first story, so I was happy to read something so familiar! Although Author's Notes can be helpful to add at the beginning of the story, I think maybe for "Tantrum" you could copy and paste it down to the bottom, that way your readers are more surprised while reading your wonderfully creative story! I think that the story has enough context clues for your readers to understand who or what story it is based on, especially since the characters are probably ones that our classmates are most familiar with! If you moved the note to the bottom, I think your readers will get a kick out of knowing that you based it on Krishna being a boy with insane powers.
Hi Riley! When I finished reading your first story, I was incredibly sad. I’m sure I am not in the minority to think that she didn’t deserve what happened. I really love happy endings, but not everyone has them which you depicted really well in your story! I quite literally laughed out loud reading the conversations in your second story, though! It definitely reminded me of some interactions I have had with people which made it so much better! I really liked how relatable you made your material. It made it really easy to learn about what you were writing about and also enjoy it! It was also a good contrast to the first story. Your final story was the best contrast! I love how you went from a sad ending, to a story full of comedy, to a story that was a bit scary! I really enjoyed reading your work! Thank you for sharing!
Hey Riley! First, let me just say WOW! Your storybook looks amazing. From the art, to the layout, to the readability, this is just fantastic. Like many others, I was saddened by the first story, of course. But your writing skills are so fantastic and so refined. It also seems like you are about done with the course, with your final story being up on the portfolio. As a whole, there are a few grammatical errors, of course, but I am sure Laura will help with that. Also, am I the only one who is kinda freaked out by the picture on the "Tantrum" story? For some reason those fingernails really creep me out. Otherwise, great work and good luck to you for the rest of the semester!
Hey Riley, My goodness, loved your story! Actually, your entire project to be quiet frank. I really think this is one of the best in our class and the way you write your stories to come to life or even including your author's note in the beginning of the story is really awesome. I especially appreciated that because sometimes it is easier to follow a story when you have the background information, rather than reading the foundation of the story at the end. You were able to add so many different layers to SunnyI feel like so many minor characters often have much more potential than the main characters and most of the time its really the side characters that make the stories that much better especially when more details are given about them. Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading more!
Hi Riley,
ReplyDeleteWow, I have to say: you have a knack for telling stories in such a beautiful way, incorporating dialogues and descriptions that make you visualize and follow the story very smoothly. I love the way you portrayed the character Sunny in such a sympathetic and innocent light. It is a very different perspective than what we were given when reading Surpanakha's story in the Ramayana. I like how you shed the labels of rakshasa/human in this story and the connotations associated with them (ie. humans are good and demons are bad). You show the flaws of the main characters of the Ramayana, how Ramsey, Lux, and Cece look down on Sunny for her unusual appearance, and how Sunny is innocent and merely longs for companionship. Your story really made me think about who is really right or wrong, and that Surpanakha deserves more attention and sympathy than we think when first reading the Ramayana.
Hi Riley! First of all, I wanted to say that I really liked the way you told this story! Your use of description and dialogue really helped set the scene, and I really liked all the dialogue, as so many of the stories that we read don't really have any. I also liked that you decided to write a story about Sunny, as I feel like she was a really interesting character that easily could have so much more depth, but she just didn't get enough time in the story. You added so many different layers to her; I feel like so many minor characters often have much more potential than the main characters, and most of the time, I like reading more about them. I think it's interesting to see how everyone picked their topics, and what stuck out to them the most out of all the material we've covered in this class. I don't really have any suggestions, I loved your story and I am excited to read more!
ReplyDeleteHi Riley,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your stories. I think your portfolio is set up really well and I enjoy your readings. I like the way you wrote your second story. I like the fact you decided to make it a podcast instead of writing an actual story. I think the podcast was a very interesting idea and really made me feel like I should write a story like that. I think the most interesting thing about everyone's portfolio is that they can all decide what stories they write about and how they want to be presented to everyone. I loved your stories and I can't wait to see what your next stories have in store. I really like how much dialogue you have decided to input for both of your stories, it really does make me feel like I'm not writing my stories as good as I can. I don't really have many suggestions for you other than keep up the good work!
Hey Riley, I want to mention how unique I found the author's note in your introduction by putting it at the beginning of the story. I really appreciated that because sometimes it is easier to follow a story when you have the background information, rather than reading the foundation of the story at the end. Your portfolio is easy on the eyes and I am grateful for that. Additionally, I like how you started your introduction with an overview, then jumped right in with a story. It was helpful to know who each character was and how their roles differ throughout your writing journey. This will help me when I read your stories in the future, as I can refer to each character's role throughout. The way you started the second story as a talk show was super creative and shows how many great ideas you have up your sleeve. I look forward to reading more, so keep up the hard work!
ReplyDeleteHello Riley! I think the way you cultivate a narrative is really on point. I found your style to be super engaging and immersive. Immersion like with your second story being a podcast is something that came easy to me, being that I watch podcasts all the time. it really helped me imagine the exact type of setting you were going for very well. I also really like how you choose to emphasize dialogue, basically telling most of a story through the dialogue. I like this approach, and it fits very much so for the second story especially.
ReplyDeleteHey Riley, First off I want to say that your writing style and the style of your portfolio, in general, is very different. Specifically, the way you write your stories is very different from any that I have read and the style of it is very unique. Your story What Would You Do? was definitely my favorite and I love the way the story was narrated. You did a really good job on that. This week we are meant to focus on the images used throughout your portfolio, and I can say you've done a great job of incorporating images. In your second story, I love that the header is just a classroom. Even though it is subtle it fits the setting of the story and definitely caught my attention. I would say you incorporate an image in your story with a caption that you can explain, other than that your portfolio is great.
ReplyDeleteHi Riley! I previously visited your storybook before, and I was excited to see what all you had added to it! This time, I read your project post, "What Would You Do?" and I really enjoyed this one! I haven't seen anything like a podcast before, and I thought this was a really creative idea, as I feel like podcasts are really gaining popularity as of late. I think that the interview style is a really great way to get in touch with some of the characters, as it's easy to incorporate a bunch of different ones while also giving a glimpse into all of their lives. It was very funny and really easy to read, so I loved that a lot! I also like how you incorporated a lot of dialogue, so we get to hear the different tones of all of the characters. Also, it was really helpful that you put the author's note at the top, so we got a little bit of insight as to where you were going. Great job on this piece, it was such a fun read!
ReplyDeleteHi Riley, as we end week 12, I took a look at more of your author's notes for each of your storybook stories. Again, I really enjoyed how you included the note at the beginning of the "What Would You Do?" story to give more background information. I also used the shapeshifting technique that Hanuman presents in my first story, so I was happy to read something so familiar! Although Author's Notes can be helpful to add at the beginning of the story, I think maybe for "Tantrum" you could copy and paste it down to the bottom, that way your readers are more surprised while reading your wonderfully creative story! I think that the story has enough context clues for your readers to understand who or what story it is based on, especially since the characters are probably ones that our classmates are most familiar with! If you moved the note to the bottom, I think your readers will get a kick out of knowing that you based it on Krishna being a boy with insane powers.
ReplyDeleteHi Riley!
ReplyDeleteWhen I finished reading your first story, I was incredibly sad. I’m sure I am not in the minority to think that she didn’t deserve what happened. I really love happy endings, but not everyone has them which you depicted really well in your story! I quite literally laughed out loud reading the conversations in your second story, though! It definitely reminded me of some interactions I have had with people which made it so much better! I really liked how relatable you made your material. It made it really easy to learn about what you were writing about and also enjoy it! It was also a good contrast to the first story. Your final story was the best contrast! I love how you went from a sad ending, to a story full of comedy, to a story that was a bit scary! I really enjoyed reading your work! Thank you for sharing!
Hey Riley!
ReplyDeleteFirst, let me just say WOW! Your storybook looks amazing. From the art, to the layout, to the readability, this is just fantastic. Like many others, I was saddened by the first story, of course. But your writing skills are so fantastic and so refined. It also seems like you are about done with the course, with your final story being up on the portfolio. As a whole, there are a few grammatical errors, of course, but I am sure Laura will help with that. Also, am I the only one who is kinda freaked out by the picture on the "Tantrum" story? For some reason those fingernails really creep me out. Otherwise, great work and good luck to you for the rest of the semester!
Hey Riley,
ReplyDeleteMy goodness, loved your story! Actually, your entire project to be quiet frank. I really think this is one of the best in our class and the way you write your stories to come to life or even including your author's note in the beginning of the story is really awesome. I especially appreciated that because sometimes it is easier to follow a story when you have the background information, rather than reading the foundation of the story at the end. You were able to add so many different layers to SunnyI feel like so many minor characters often have much more potential than the main characters and most of the time its really the side characters that make the stories that much better especially when more details are given about them. Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading more!